Bill Cosby leaves court in handcuffs on Tuesday September 25 2018 after being sentenced to three to 10 years in prison for drugging and sexually assaulting a woman, Andrea Constand, at his home 14 years ago.
So this semester I’m taking Information Privacy Law and…I don’t use the word iconic lightly but this professor is actually iconic.
For optimum effectiveness please imagine all of these being said in an accent that can approximately be described as “London by way of Minnesota.”
I’ll update this post as the semester goes on.
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“If the law made sense we would all be out of a job.”
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“One of my students…he hasn’t said anything about it but I’m pretty sure he works for the NSA. I mean, he showed up at my office in a black suit in the middle of July talking about all these FISA warrants he’s working on at the ‘Department of Justice’.”
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“It wasn’t, like, orgies or anything, just suburban 1964 bedroom stuff…actually, what do I know?”
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“Publication is not an eleph- well. It’s definitely not an elephant. But it’s also not an element of this Tort.”
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“We’ve got Glenn Michael, who sounds like George Michael’s perverted little brother, and his wife who…actually she never gets named. She’s just Former Wife. She’s a stock character.”
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“It’s easy to tell funny inappropriate jokes. Funny appropriate jokes that are relevant to points of law…well that’s the gold standard.”
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“This is where the court differs…from all sane human beings.”
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“…one of those lovely large cohesive loving families of the sort you see on Game of Thrones.”
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“Murder is worse than being clever.”
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“I mean it was bad Greek poetry, but probably better than your average five year old. Probably better than me now.”
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“This marker’s dead…YEET!” *throws marker directly into bin* “Oh. That’s…that’s the first time I’ve actually made it. I have to tell my daughter that it works!”
“Consent is garbage.” [long pause] “Well no obviously consent is really important but consent as understood by data protection law is garbage.”
“Tomorrow – wait, no, our tomorrow, which is Monday…”
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“Somewhere between those two dystopias is, we hope, a happy medium…”
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“Okay but what if the police knock on my door and ask if they can look around and I say ‘oh yes of course, that would be lovely, come in, have a cup of tea, I’ve just been baking you should have some scones…’ – I am NOT going to take comments about my pronunciation of ‘scones’ so put your hands down.”
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“The weird sad thing is now teenagers in America know what a TARDIS is but have no idea what a phone booth looks like.”
“When we’re being watched by the police, we’re less likely to shoplift…well, one is less likely to shoplift, I don’t presume to speak for all of you…”
There was literally an article in this Sunday’s New York Post dragging Aaron Burr for saddling NYC with a grid system instead of wide Parisian boulevards. The first line was “We’ll never have Paris here in New York. But we could have … if not for Aaron Burr.” Marvelous. Hamilton’s ghost is weeping tears of joy.
This is the best addition to this post in 10,000+ notes and I would like to personally thank you for sharing this crucially important historical development
200+ years later and Burr still can’t catch a break from Alexander Hamilton’s legacy
vanhalenofficial 